The Lawudo Temple, 1984. Photo courtesy of Michelle Le Dimna.

Michelle Le Dimna arrived in Kopan for the 1978 November course and stayed in Nepal and India following teachings and doing retreat until February 1985. Michelle has spent about 40 years translating Dharma books into French. She was instrumental in organizing relic tours in France and Belgium and helped with fundraising for the Maitreya Project. 

Below is Michelle Le Dimna’s account of her visit to Solu Khumbu in 1984-1985 and her three-month winter retreat in Lawudo.

This story was first published in the Love Lawudo quarterly newsletter #5 in 2019. 

Rinpoche’s Advice and the Hardships of Getting to Lawudo

After Lama [Yeshe] passed away, I had the opportunity to have a long interview with [Lama Zopa] Rinpoche. It was the first time I could really accept whatever he would tell me to do. First, he sent me to Namo Buddha for a month’s retreat, then he told me to go for a three-month retreat at Lawudo. It’s difficult nowadays to imagine a world without the internet and even without a phone. I had no idea what I would find there, and I couldn’t tell anyone in Lawudo that I was coming. So, while waiting in Kathmandu at the end of the monsoon, I prepared what I thought would be necessary for my survival: a stove and kerosene. I remember not knowing whether Ani Samten [Lama Zopa Rinpoche’s sister] would be able to cook for me.

I took a bus from Kathmandu, but it didn’t get very far because a landslide had cut the road off, so I found myself at night in a shop, looking for a porter to help me to carry my load to Lawudo. A Nepali man said he would do it. I noticed that he was wearing smart shoes, but he was the only choice I had. After one day’s walk, he asked me for his money and made his escape without any warning in the early morning. I then found a young guy in the village, with bare feet, wearing very light white clothing, who was quite poor but also quite strong. As the nights were getting cool, I started to lend him my shawl, but after a few days I noticed I had got a lot of body lice which were quite hard to get rid of! He would only eat potatoes as he wanted to save as much money as possible. As he was not a talkative or noisy one, it was really nice to walk with him, day after day. It took maybe ten days in total to reach Namche. I felt very sorry that I was not able to give him as much money as he deserved, but there were no banks there and I had to keep enough for the three months to come.

Ani Samten (Lama Zopa Rinpoche’s sister) and Amala (Lama Zopa Rinpoche’s mother), Lawudo, 1984. Photo courtesy of Michelle Le Dimna.

The Difficulties and the Joys of Being at Lawudo

I bought butter and tsampa at the Namche market—it would be my daily breakfast—but the butter was not clean and there was a lot of moisture in it. It certainly didn’t help my stomach problems and I had dysentery during my whole stay because of amoebas and other parasites. I met Ani Samten and the monk from Kopan who was helping her, at the market and we walked together to Lawudo. Ani Samten was about my age, and I considered her as a sister. The relationship was easy and warm, we could communicate with our broken English.

Ani Samten preparing butter tea, 1984. Photo courtesy of Michelle Le Dimna.

With Amala [Lama Zopa Rinpoche’s mother], we only had a dozen of Tibetan words to communicate in: yapodu, yapomindu, tsutiche, mambo tsutiche and so on. Anyway, she was continuously reciting loudly OM MANI PADME HUM. The only conversations we had were concerning Rinpoche. She reminded me of my mother who had to bear not having news of her daughter for so long.

I had lunch with Amala and Ani Samten every day. I enjoyed eating potatoes every day very much. I love potatoes and am very used to them because I come from Bretagne [France]. They were very tasty with erma (timut in Nepali), chili sauce, and butter, of course. The potatoes would be sliced and dried in the sun or else placed in a big hole in the ground so that they wouldn’t get frozen. Every evening I went back to the kitchen for a short while just to enjoy a tea and sit by the fireplace. 

I was staying in a room just above the gompa and wearing my down jacket day and night. In December for sure, but maybe even before that, the water became frozen. The sun was hot during the day, so I don’t think I suffered from the cold. At night, sometimes I would sit outside and look at the sky. At the beginning I was very surprised to see so many shooting stars. They were very close and once I could hear the sound of a meteorite falling down very nearby. I thought I would be able to find it the next day, but it didn’t happen. It felt like magic, but actually it was simply because the meteorites were catching fire while entering into the atmosphere and the atmosphere is not far above at that altitude.

At the end of my retreat I allowed myself to tour around a bit. I had the opportunity to have a meeting with Charok Lama, using my poor words of Hindi and Tibetan! Another time, I went down to Thami, the village where Rinpoche was born. I also participated in a few pujas at the nunnery down below, which was very powerful. I am full of memories!

Remembering Death

Throughout the three months, only once did a group of trekkers visit Lawudo. Other than that, I saw no other Westerners. They were French, so we had a bit of a conversation. A week later, when Ani Samten came back from the market in Namche, she told me that one lady from this group had fallen down from the path and died. I was shocked. And it reminded me how strongly I felt the presence of death when I was preparing for my trip to Lawudo. Lama Lhundrup especially insisted very much that I should remember death at all times. He told me that Zina also went to the Himalayas for retreat, but she died up there before finishing it, so I had to be ready, he said something like that.

Dreaming of a Nice Hot Shower

Michelle Le Dimna fire puja at Kopan Monastery at the end of her three month retreat at Lawudo, 1985. Helped by young Daja Wangchuk. Photo courtesy of Michelle Le Dimna.

When the first snowfall came, I had to think of getting back down from the mountains. Ani Samten filled up my rucksack with crushed aromatic plants such as juniper, which came to 21 kilos. But when I started to make my way back, I had so much energy that I was running all the time. It didn’t take me long to get to Kathmandu, a week if I remember well. I was in such a dirty state that on my way I was dreaming more and more of a hot shower and when I arrived at my regular hotel, The Blue Star, I went straight to the shower. I put on the soap, but either the water was cold or there was no water! Strong expectations but big laughter, rather than big disappointment. When I was back in Kopan—where I performed the fire puja—Rinpoche invited me for a Sherpa meal one-to-one as he wanted to have fresh news of his family.

So that was my experience of doing retreat at Lawudo. Years later, when I read The Lawudo Lama I realized that I had no idea of the power of the place, it was incredible! So, this is just my small story at my level. But I feel very grateful to have been given this opportunity and to have had this connection.

Please consider subscribing to the Lawudo newsletter which is published four times each year on the major holy days. For more information about Lawudo Gompa and Retreat Center, please visit the Lawudo Gompa website. You can also follow Lawudo on Facebook. 

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